Bedroom scenes are great, but they can only go so far and last so long. If you crave more D/S dynamics in the rest of your life then the solution is not more scenes, even though that would be very nice. The next step in your relationship with your sub would be to incorporate power exchanges into more aspects of your lives. There are two main realms of power exchange: mental and physical. Within these two realms are so many options and levels that it’s impossible to discuss them all. This guide aims to just get you thinking about all your options.
This is known as the sub giving her Dom control of her actions, even when they’re not together. These operate more or less on an honor basis, though there can be punishments set up if she fails to adhere to the rules. These generally involve regulating some natural process. For example, your sub may not be allowed to orgasm except when you’re having sex with her. She won’t be allowed to touch herself unless you’re there with her.
A surprisingly intimate and controlling option is food control. Your sub can only eat what, when, and how much you tell her to. You have every option in the world, from making her skip meals to feeding her home made pizza until she gets a stomach ache. Having to ask you for permission to even eat a granola bar will keep you at the forefront of her mind at all times. She’ll be entirely dependent on you to give her adequate care. Try it for an afternoon at first, and then slowly increase the length of time you give her. For health reasons, your sub should always be free to drink as much water as she needs. Don’t restrict hydration for any extended period of time.
You can move on from that with something like a small butt plug. These unobtrusive devices take some getting used to, but will provide a constant reminder that she’s yours. If she enjoys anal stimulation, these are even better. She can get an erotic charge from everything from washing the dishes to driving home from work.
If your sub has the day off from other responsibilities, you can draw up a schedule for her. Marking out when she’s going to go to the store and what time she’s going to be home, when she’s going to perform household chores, or even when she masturbates rides the line between physical and mental control. This is a daylong exercise in submission, so when you finally get home be sure to reward her with the same amount of aftercare you would if you’d finished a scene together.
Power exchanges outside of the bedroom can bring you closer than ever before as a couple. It also helps build the anticipation for the active scenes you have together. Start slow and build up your activities and actions as time goes on.