Some kinks are typically frowned on due to society norms. If you have some of those kinks, you probably know just how difficult it is to find someone who enjoys them as well. Fantasy is nothing more than allowing your imagination to create things that wouldn’t be possible in the real world. Some people fail to understand that we are able to separate fantasy from reality when it comes to our kinks. Just because you enjoy something in a made up world, doesn’t mean you’d ever attempt it in real life, and if you want to try out the common fantasy of captor and captive, you can use these tips to get you started.
Talk It Out
Before you begin your fantasy, you’re going to have to make sure that both you and your lady set some ground rules. While fantasy play is fun, it can also become extremely intense if either of you loses yourself to your emotions.
The first thing you need to do is come up with two separate safe words, one for you and one for her. Make sure your safe word isn’t one that you would typically use during sex. You should also try to avoid using words such a, “stop,” “no,” and “don’t.” Remember, because of the nature of your fantasy, your captive may use these words to make the scene more believable. You can also try using the popular green, yellow, and red codes to tell when she’s uncomfortable with something or if she’s enjoying it.
After the two of you have decided your safe words and shared them with each other, you need to discuss the general plan for the night. Make sure she is always aware whenever you’re ready to start the scene. Do not surprise her. If you do, you can end up terrifying her to the point where she will never want to try fantasy play again. If you plan to do anything that can be seen as painful like spanking or slapping her, make sure you have her permission and know what her pain level is. You don’t want to injure her.
Be in the Scene
Depending on what you have worked out, take some time to really get into your fantasy play. If she’s agreed to it early on, tie her to the bed or bound and taunt her with your touches. Don’t be afraid to come up with your own script or dialogue to follow. This is your fantasy, have some fun with it.
When things start getting physical, you can find out how she’s doing both mentally and physically by using those color codes. You don’t need to break character for this. If you’re behind her with your fingers in her hair, tug her head back and whisper, “What’s your color?” or “What color are you?” If she answers green, keep going. If she answers yellow, ease back and try something else and then ask her for her color again. If she says red, stop. Give her a moment to compose herself and ask her for her color once more. If she gives you another red, stop the scene and immediately begin reassuring her that everything is all right.
Captor and captive fantasy play is both exciting and arousing, but it’s not worth damaging your relationship or hurting your lady. No matter how much you’re enjoying it, always make sure that’s she’s enjoying it just as much.